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Neurodiversity Suicide Prevention Hub
Neurodiversity is an umbrella term referring to a range of conditions including autism, ADHD, dyslexia, dyspraxia and Tourette’s syndrome. An estimated one in seven people in the UK are neurodiverse, meaning that their brain functions differently.
We can learn more about the links between neurodiversity and suicide to better support those at risk. The information on this hub provides resources for those who need support, and for family, loved ones and professionals.
Being neurodiverse can bring advantages such as high creative thinking, being solution driven, organised and seeing patterns. However there can also be huge life challenges for a neurodivergent person. Many neurodiverse people need understanding and adaption to their environment and communication to help them manage.
There is still a lack of understanding and social stigma surrounding neurodivergent conditions. Many face discrimination, bullying, and being marginalised. This can lead to feelings of being judged, excluded, misunderstood, and despair. These destructive experiences can significantly impact mental health and increase the risk of suicide.
9x
In the UK, autistic adults are nine times more likely to die by suicide than the general population.
15 – 20%
It is estimated that between 15 and 20% of the UK population are neurodivergent.
11%
Autistic people make up approximately 1% of the population but 11% of suicides.
These pages offer specific guidance, advice and resources for those living with different types of neurodiversity.
Voices of Hope podcast
Our podcast series brings together mental health professionals, people with lived experience, local government, researchers, educators and more about how their work connects to suicide and what we can do as a community to prevent suicide.
In this episode, we speak with Emily Nuttall and Molly Taylor, two members of our Lived Experience Advisory Group, who share their experiences of living with neurodivergence and suicidal thoughts.
[blog title]
[blog placeholder copy] Read our blog to learn more about the links between suicide and neurodiversity.
Dawn Howard – Clinical Lead, Neurodevelopmental Service, Sussex Partnership NHS Foundation Trust
Find help now
If you are having suicidal thoughts and need help now, please use the links below.
Emergency services
If you or someone you know is experiencing a life-threatening crisis.
- Call 999 (UK)
- Call 112 (most of Europe)
- Find emergency numbers for other countries
Stay Alive app
Download our NHS recommended app if you are struggling with suicidal thoughts or concerned about someone. There are over 800 resources to help you stay safe for now.
Samaritans
Contact the Samaritans if you feel you are in a crisis.
- Call 116 123
- Email jo@samaritans.org
- Visit the website
Contact your GP
They will help you get support from the right services and will sometimes take appointments over the phone.
- Find your GP contact details
- If your GP practice is closed or unavailable, call NHS 111
- Visit the NHS 111 website
SANEline
Mental health helpline offering specialist emotional support, guidance and information to anyone affected by mental illness, including family, friends and carers.
- Call 0300 304 7000
- Visit the website
Mind
Mental health charity with trained advisors to talk about your mental health.
- Chat online
- Support line - call 0300 102 1234
- Infoline - call 0300 123 3393
Suicide and neurodiversity: myths and facts
Some phrases and assumptions around neurodiversity and suicide add to the weight of social stigma and shame. This makes those at risk more likely to struggle in silence and can increase the chance that they will act on their suicidal thoughts.
Here are some of the most common and harmful myths and misconceptions. Select each myth to see the real facts and explanations.
Myth: Neurodiversity is a disease that needs to be cured.
Myth: Neurodiversity only affects men
Myth: Neurodiversity is a mental health problem
Myth: If a person is serious about killing themselves then there's nothing you can do
Myth: People who threaten suicide are just seeking attention
Myth: Most suicides happen with no warning
Myth: People thinking about suicide are insane or mentally ill
Myth: Neurodiversity is a disease that needs to be cured.
Fact: Neurodiversity is a natural human variation.
Neurodiversity is an inherent human variation, occurring not unlike hair colour or skin tone. The idea that neurodiversity is an illness can be harmful, as it reinforces the stigma that neurodivergent people are somehow ‘wrong’. Some neurodivergent individuals may struggle with symptoms of their condition so it is important to understand how we can support them to live with this, rather than seeking to ‘cure’ them. In fact, because neurodivergent people’s brains work differently, we should embrace their strengths. In fact some employers actively seek neurodivergent applicants.
Myth: Neurodiversity only affects men
Fact: Neurodiversity affects all genders
While it is true that men are diagnosed at a higher rate than women, this does not indicate that only men are affected. All genders are affected by neurodiversity and recent research suggest that many women are undiagnosed, commonly due to a lack of understanding of the presentation of symptoms in women and learned ability to mask their symptoms—to hide or minimise behaviours that might be deemed socially unacceptable.
Myth: Neurodiversity is a mental health problem
Fact: Neurodiversity is not the same as mental illness.
The different conditions that are considered under the umbrella of neurodiversity are not mental health conditions but affect the way individuals process information. However, many people who are neurodivergent are at high risk of experiencing mental health conditions, such as depression, which can lead to suicidality.
Myth: If a person is serious about killing themselves then there's nothing you can do
Fact: Many suicidal crises can be relatively short-lived
Most people who feel suicidal do not want to end their lives, they just want the situation they are in or the pain to end. This can be a short, but very intense, period.
The distinction may seem small, but it is very important. It’s why talking through other options at the right time is so vital. Safely intervene to keep people safe until mental health services can take over.
Myth: People who threaten suicide are just seeking attention
Fact: Anyone talking about suicide needs serious attention
People who talk about suicide need attention – they are in pain and may feel hopeless. Most people who die by suicide have talked about it first – we should always take comments very seriously that indicate they don’t want to be here anymore, or people are better off without them.
Do not dismiss a suicide attempt as simply being an attention-gaining device. It is likely that this attention is needed and may well save their lives.
Myth: Most suicides happen with no warning
Fact: Warning signs, verbally or behaviourally, precede most suicides
Many people who are suicidal may only show warning signs to those closest to them. These loved ones may not recognise what’s going on, which leads to the idea that it was ‘sudden’ or ‘unexpected’.
It is important to be alert to potential warning signs and be prepared to ask about suicide if you are concerned for someone else. These subtle warning behaviours and comments can easily be missed or spread across several people. You can find out more here.
Some autistic people experience alexithymia (challenges in recognizing, expressing, feeling, sourcing, and describing emotions) or may mask their feelings so may not outwardly portray their distress through tone of voice or facial expressions.
Myth: People thinking about suicide are insane or mentally ill
Fact: One in five people have thought about suicide at some time in their life
Many people who die by suicide have struggled with their mental health, and others whose mental state meets psychiatric criteria for mental illness and who need psychiatric help. At the same time, some people experiencing suicidal ideation have no history of mental problems at all.
Suicide is complex and it is often most likely a combination of individual, relationship, community, and societal risk factors that can increase the possibility that a person will attempt suicide.
How to talk about neurodiversity
When discussing neurodiversity, it’s important to use language that reflects the varied experiences of neurodivergent individuals, acknowledging both their challenges and strengths. The words we choose can help shape how people view themselves and others, so it’s essential to prioritise respectful and inclusive terminology.
Neurodiversity isn’t always synonymous with a ‘disability.’ Some neurodivergent individuals may identify as having a disability, while others view it as simply a difference in how they think and experience the world. It’s essential to reflect the perspective and preferences of the individual, especially when discussing disability. For example, you might say: “For some autistic individuals, navigating the social world can present challenges.”
Avoid using terms like ‘high-functioning’ or ‘low-functioning.’ These labels can oversimplify and misrepresent the complex realities of neurodivergent experiences. “High-functioning” can unintentionally suggest that someone needs less support, while “low-functioning” may contribute to an unfair perception of someone being less capable. Instead, focus on specific needs or challenges: “This individual may need assistance with social interaction” or “This person thrives in structured environments.”
Avoid terms like ‘suffering from,’ ‘afflicted by,’ or ‘victim of.’ These phrases imply that neurodivergence is something inherently negative or a condition to be “fixed.” Instead, refer to individuals as “having autism” or “having ADHD,” which removes the negative connotations and highlights that neurodivergence is simply part of who they are.
Be mindful of language when discussing traits or challenges. Using terms like ‘symptoms’ can mistakenly imply that autism is a disease. Instead, use ‘characteristics’ or ‘traits’ to describe behaviours or differences. Likewise, avoid words like ‘treat’ or ‘treatment,’ and opt for ‘support’ or ‘adjustments’ to highlight how we can improve the lives of neurodiverse individuals.
How to talk about suicide
Timing Timing is key. Asking about suicide is an important conversation and needs to be treated with respect.
You might think the best time to ask about suicide is when someone is down or upset, but they are more likely to close down and not want to talk at this point. Instead, ask when they’re having a good day and likely feeling more talkative.
Do remember that someone’s internal monologue might be telling them that don’t deserve help, they’re not good enough, or are a failure. Allow them to open up and direct the conversation – don’t ambush them or make them feel targeted.
Location Talking in a place where someone feels unsafe or rushed may affect what they say. Your choice may depend on the specific risks or situations the person may be experiencing.
1. At home or in a safe, quiet and private place
It’s easier to talk to someone when they are comfortable and not worried about showing emotions or speaking their mind. Find a time when it’s just the two of you and you can talk as long as you need without having to rush off.
2. While doing something you enjoy together
Many people may feel less under pressure if they don’t have to maintain eye contact. It can also be helpful to focus on an enjoyed activity as this gives you both space to pause, reflect and gather thoughts without awkward silences. Choose an activity that they will find enjoyable and avoid tasks that may feel like chores or errands.
3. On a walk or in a quiet place
You could suggest going for a walk in a quiet or familiar place. Nature can often help people to feel more relaxed, but it is important to check first.
Start the conversation Remember the four Cs: appear Calm, Confident, Consistent and Compassionate, however you feel inside.
Talking to someone about how they are can be difficult, especially if you believe they are struggling. You might not know what to say, or feel worried about how they will react.
Here are some suggestions on how to start the conversation:
“How are you feeling?”
“What has been the best and worst part of your day today?”
“It seems like you’ve been struggling lately. Are you comfortable talking with me about what’s going on?”
“I’ve noticed you’ve had a few down days lately, can you let me know how you’re feeling or what you’re thinking about?”
- “If you are having feelings that are hard deal to with or scared of, you can always talk to me. I won’t be upset, I just want to listen.”
Ask about suicide It is important to be clear when you ask about suicide, use direct language and avoid euphemisms.
This might be difficult, so remember: you are asking the question because it is important to know the answer.
- Have you been thinking about suicide?
- Do you feel like you don’t want to be in this world anymore?
- Do you want to close your eyes and never wake up?
- Do you have any plans on hurting or killing yourself?
When they answer, listen with empathy and without judgement. You will find advice on what to say and what not to say further down this page. Be careful not to look shocked or upset as this may cause them to close up or be less honest. Be prepared to listen, even if it’s hard to hear, and try to stay calm.
What to say
Here are some ways to keep the conversation going and opportunities to offer hope, support and empathy to those who are struggling.
It can be very hard to ask these questions; remember it is always better to ask about suicide and get a definitive answer than to avoid asking and miss an opportunity to connect someone with urgent support.
Reassurance and giving them time
- “Just take your time, there’s no rush.”
- “I know talking about this can be difficult. I’m here to listen.”
- “You can tell me anything.”
- “I want to listen and understand.”
Reassure them that they matter to you, you’re here to listen and support and you don’t need to rush off.
Many people who feel suicidal will feel worthless, especially if their struggles have been brushed off or downplayed. Showing them you are prioritising them and the conversation will mean a lot.
Asking how long these feelings have been present
- “How long have you been feeling this way?”
- “Have you felt this way before?”
Ask how and when their feelings changed and, if they have experienced this before, what happened last time.
Reassure them that they won’t feel this way forever, and that the very intense feelings can and will change with time.
Asking about plans for suicide
- “Have you got a plan? What is it?”
- “Have you thought about how you would kill yourself?”
- “Have you thought about when you would kill yourself?”
- “Have you taken any steps to get the things you would need to carry out your plan?”
- “Have you thought about how you might do this?”
This is important.
People who have made a suicide plan are at more risk. Let them know that you care about them and that they aren’t alone.
If they start talking about the immediate future or plans for that day, it is important to stay with them and seek further help.
Having empathy
- “I can’t imagine how painful this is for you, but I would like to try to understand.”
- “I’m here, we can find a way to get through this.”
Empathise with them. Be aware you don’t know exactly how they feel and may never experience or understand what is going on in their mind.
Remind them that you have the time to listen and that you want to hear them.
Offering hope
- “You’re not alone, lots of people feel like this.”
- “I’m glad you’re telling me how you feel.”
- “You know, one in five people have thoughts like yours and recover from them, it is okay to feel like this.”
Try to offer hope and context – they are not alone, others feel this way and there is a lot of help available for them. Remind them that people can find ways to get through tough times and that you will help them.
Talking about the future
- “What reasons do you have for staying alive?”
Ask about their reasons for living and dying and listen to their answers. Focus on people they care about, and who care about them. People are less likely to attempt suicide when they have positive future events to focus on.
Keep asking open-ended questions – this means there isn’t a yes or no answer, but an opportunity for them to speak more, continuing the conversation.
Thanking them for opening up
- “Thank you for sharing this with me.”
Encourage them to seek help that they are comfortable with. This could be a doctor, therapist, counsellor or one of the many resources listed on these pages.